Tuesday, February 3, 2015

PiTy Party


Strange day and night. Drizzle, cold for Texas, overall depressing.

Have a huge number of very important VIP's arriving in next few days. 

From Saudi, Japan, Iowa, California, Florida, DC, damn farm feels like Disney land.

Had several excellent meetings this week with my developing management team. 

Good news is they are probably, no that is 'BS", they are smarter than me, but they still do not play chess as well as I do. 

So far, I am the better chess player. I need to cling to that, my dad used to say. " it is a poor dog that does does wag his own tail once in awhile."

Sara and Jeremy, the two folks that entered Lori and my lives over a year ago still are proving invaluable.. 

Plus they are restoring my faith in human kind. They do not know it but I am beginning to realize because of them that there are decent, honest, and caring people out there. 

Lori always said I shut myself off too much. Jeremy and Sara are helping me change that. 

I am sad tonight. Maybe it is the weather but I think it is just missing Lori. About an hour ago two dolphins surfaced off the deck of the house looking three feet away in the canal. 

God knows if we humans need proof that we are not the smartest and most compassionate examples of the animal life on this planet then just spend 3 minutes observing dolphins. 

They actually see through your soul.

I am enjoying Texas but torn in that I miss being in the home Lori built for us in Maryland. Don't miss the traffic and the taxes but I miss the smell and feel of Lori.

I will get back there in a few days. 

Not to bore you but the house that Lori made into a home for me and Stephen and the animals was different. It was not a MacMansion. It was a "home" in the truest sense of the word.


This is our kitchen, (which for the record Lori never cooked in.)




This was our living room, which like everything in our house was covered in dog art.



This was a Wardle, we have several originals, all of which Lori helped me find. If you love dogs and dog oils Andrew Wardle will be a familiar name, if not just enjoy his talent.



But Lori had a humorous side. I love foxes, hell I love all animals.

She saw this lead glass hand painted mosaic of  the Aesop fable of the fox in the grape yard and got it for me. I absolutely love it an and every time I see it I think of her. 

And I smile and that is a good thing.



Some men collect cars, some trophies (animals heads, ugh) some men collect beautiful women, some money, some homes, or airplanes.

I always loved collecting and meeting characters. 

(For the record, I think Lori was the most beautiful woman I ever met, inside and out). 

I have been lucky, I have met the Richard Gere's, Cindy Crawford's, Candice Bergman, Susan Butcher, Walter Cronkite, Charlie Wilson, Tom Cruise, Olivia Newton-John, and a core of others, but my wife was my favorite and most unique character.

Our relationship was not perfect. I suspect few are. I told Aquilino the other night that overall 25% of our marriage was bliss, about 60% was good and about 15% was hell. 

He said I should quit bitching, I was more fortunate than most.

I miss some of my characters, great deal. 

Deday Larene, a noted criminal attorney in Detroit who frankly, helped me grow up and start to see the world as it is, not as it is packaged.

I miss Stephen Boynton, an alcoholic, but brilliant lawyer who disagreed fundamentally philosophically with virtually every view I had, but who I admired for his wit and wisdom.

I miss a lot of characters that have gone before me.

But I have blessings as well, Mike O'Sullivan my Irish -Canadian  friend and protector of 36 years is back in my life. 

I love and enjoy my son, Stephen.

I adore my team, Eduardo, Groe, Tim, Nick, John Harvin, Chris, and Paul Januzzo and so on. 

Everyone one of them is a character. If it were two hundred years ago we would met yearly in New Orleans to divide the spoils of our blunder from our "pirateeing." 

You know what this blog is about tonight. I am having a stupid pity party. I am used to being alone but with Lori I was never lonely. Go figure! 

Some characters you simply cannot replace.

GBT stands on the verge of changing the world in showing that profitability, environmentalism, social equity and ethical capitalism is possible, but it is bittersweet, I wanted her to see this all come to fruition. 

Don't know what you believe about life after death.

John Aquilino says God had a plan for Lori and I just have to accept it.

In a John Wayne movie long ago, "Chisum"at the end of the movie Ben Johnson says to the Duke "Well, Mr. Chisum like they say, there is no law west of the Pecos and no God west of the Brazos." 

To which John Wayne replies, "Wrong Mr. Pepper, for where ever people go the law follows and where ever men travel, they find God has already been there."

Sorry about the self pity blog tonight. I am damn good at being alone, but I am not doing so well at being lonely. 

No comments:

Post a Comment